Much like the rest of the internet, online video games are a technological and interpersonal marvel. Regardless of location and language, people can explore vast worlds and compete against one another — all from the comfort of their homes. For all of its many benefits, there are adverse side effects. Online gaming communities can breed hostility, particularly in competitive environments. This can be especially damaging for young children. Thankfully, there are ways to monitor and protect your kids.
Talk to Your Kids
The first step in these situations is establishing a dialogue with your children. Explain to them that you don’t intend to overstep their boundaries or deny them enjoyment. Instead, you’re taking these steps for their safety and mental well-being. Allow your child to offer any counterarguments and come to a resolution together. Any of the following methods can be potential solutions you and your child can agree on.
Turn off Voice Chat
Turning off voice chat is probably the most drastic but effective method. During a heated match, it’s easy for someone to engage in smack talk or let loose a string of profanity to their teammates out of frustration. If you don’t want your child to hear these remarks, simply mute voice chat. Have them communicate over text chat only, unless the harassment continues there.
However, two major downsides come with this step. Your child may feel as if you distrust them or are sheltering them unnecessarily. This is less likely if you’ve already discussed all other options together as a family. The other is hindering your child’s experience. Voice chat is crucial in many games to coordinate as a team. If communicating by voice is vital, try limiting voice chat to friends only.
If your child plays games with a set group of friends, allow them to use voice chat with them exclusively. Make sure you know at least some information about these friends first. If they’re classmates or friends in real life, there’s no need to be overly cautious. For strangers, remind your child to never divulge information about their personal lives even if they trust them in the game.
Watch Them Play
Now, we aren’t suggesting you hover over their shoulder and “backseat game,” as some call it. Rather, set up the console or their computer in a public space. In the living room or dining room are popular options. You don’t have to be actively watching them either. Simply sitting in the same room or listening from the kitchen will do. If you hear your child begin to get frustrated, intervene.
A good compromise for older children who value privacy is to let them play games in their room, but leave the door open. This gives them some agency but allows you to hear if things go sour. You may also ask that they refrain from using headphones. Again, discuss this in-depth with your child to find the solution right for your family.
Limit Their Time Online
Some parents may restrict online or screen time to a set period, typically an hour or two. Setting a time limit means children are less likely to encounter toxic behavior while gaming, or at least experience it for only a short time. This doesn’t always work, though. Essentially everything is online now. If your child wants to spend time on social media or streaming videos, it’ll cut into their time playing games. Additionally, you can’t limit online time if your child attends school remotely.
Alternatively, you might want to set up a specific time just for gaming. Right after school or in the evening are the more common choices. These carry their own pros and cons. For example, peak gaming hours are between 7 p.m. and 10 p.m. for many titles. If your child plays during this period, the odds of them encountering hostility will increase.
Set up Parental Controls
Almost every popular video game offers a parental control option. Typically, these functions limit features like voice and text chat. There may also be a built-in timer. When the timer runs out, the console or the internet connection will turn off. Depending on the device, you may use an app from your phone. The Nintendo Switch, for instance, has its own Parental Control app that allows you to control the console remotely.
Encourage Offline Play
For every online title, there are plenty of others that are single-player and offline. Titles like “Cuphead,” “Five Nights at Freddy’s,” and “Super Mario Odyssey” are all extremely popular with kids but lack a major online component. There may be online leaderboards or the ability to share missions, but there’s no direct interaction with other players during gameplay.
Other games may have online features or social aspects but are perfectly playable without them. “Animal Crossing: New Horizons” allows players to visit each other’s islands, but it’s never required to advance the story. “Among Us” may be a social deduction game, but single-player games against AI are available. Many games with optional online features offer stricter guidelines regarding online interactions. In “Mario Kart 8 Deluxe,” players can communicate only through a select number of prewritten responses.
That’s not to say that offline games are a perfect solution. “Minecraft” in the solo-player option may be enjoyable, but there’s something uniquely special about creating and traversing a world with friends. Even if there’s no online component — or the online functionality is no longer available —- there may still be a toxic community surrounding the game.
Avoid Social Media
There are countless debates on whether children should be allowed to use social media. Regardless of where you stand on the discussion, the fact is that many toxic gaming communities continue their hostility on sites like Twitter and Reddit. They may make posts decrying specific playstyles and harass anybody who disagrees. It can be damaging to a child’s mental state to see that. Encourage your child to avoid social media posts about their favorite games, particularly after a stressful match.
There’s no cut-and-dried way to keep your child from encountering toxic mindsets while gaming without taking some drastic measures. Still, even the smallest countermeasure can significantly impact your kid’s well-being. Above all else, remind your child of one thing: At the end of the day, it’s still just a game.